Last week a friend from work invited me to hang out with her and her mom group. I decided to join her and had a nice time. At lunchtime we went to the food court and while there I overheard some of the ladies discussing their children's "birth stories". I was a few seats over from them, so I wasn't engaged in their conversation, but over the noise of the food court I heard the words: labor, epidural, dilated, tired, and c-section, just to name a few. I wondered if they would ask me how my child's birth went, and I wondered what I would say. To be honest, I felt a bit like an outsider. If I had a birth story like theirs I might have been tempted to join in. But, I didn't, and I wondered if it would be awkward if they were to ask me and I then related how my child was adopted.
Trust me, I am not embarrassed in the least to tell about my child's adoption. You just never know how others will react, and I didn't know these ladies that well, and it just didn't come up.
But, the more I thought about after the play group was over, the more I wished I had been asked about his birth. I would have told them about how anxious I was to hear news about him on the day of his delivery. I know a few details about his birth that I could share. And then I could tell about how stressful it was getting the flowers delivered to his birthmother. And how I was an emotional mess when there was a glitch with the flower delivery. I would tell them about how we went out to dinner to celebrate our little guy's birthday. Not many ladies can do that. I could also tell about how we packed up our favorite snacks and all of his gear to take with us on our travels to meet our little guy for the first time. I might also tell them how the social worker and I were wearing the same style and color shirt when we went to meet up with everyone in the hospital for the first time. Our little guy was so cute and little. I fell in love with him the minute I laid eyes on him. (I loved him before that, but to see him and hold him, was so special). I would tell about feeding him while I was there and how I was praying he would be a good eater and not be fussy when I held him. He was great! I might share how we finally found a hotel in that area with a semi-comfortable bed to sleep on, for what few hours of sleep I was able to get with everything going on. And then if I were asked if I was nervous about getting everything finalized I would reply, most definitely. But I would tell them of my love and respect for our little guy's birthparents. There were a few bumps in the road, and I was a nervous wreck that last day, but everything worked out in the end. I might share about the gifts we gave our birthparents and that we were able to meet some of their family members. And then I would share that we traveled home with our baby in the backseat calling our family members to share the news as quickly as we could. I would share how happy we were and how excited everyone was to hear the news. And by that point in my story my smile would be wide, my eyes would be wet, and I would feel a great happiness in my heart. How do I know that? Well, because that is what is happening right now as I type this.
And that is my child's birth story. I think it's amazing and I love it.